think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
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