im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
