she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
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