it's too hot outside to masturbate.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
