So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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