Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Drake has all the answers
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize