I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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