no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize