know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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