yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
