Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
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