So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
