Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
