It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
