Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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