which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
