Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
This toilet bowl is my home.
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