Already got asked if we're dating
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Randomize