I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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