I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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