I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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