Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
i think i just lost a toe
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
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