i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
