I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
