I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
