omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
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