i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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