He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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