So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
