white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Dicks are not precious.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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