If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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