she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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