The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
