using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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