I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
