ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Randomize