yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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