guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
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Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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