Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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