Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
