hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
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