i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
