If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
