But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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