I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize