remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
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