my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
