my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
