it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize