Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
