No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
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