Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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